While readers of Fallout Equestria: Project Horizons eagerly await Somber's next chapter, user Jacky2734 proposed a little competition to help pass the time: write a short, 300 word story in the universe of Fallout: Equestria. Having lurked the comment posts since the infant stages of the story, I figured I should finally make myself known. This 339 word story stemmed from reading too much Fight Club and an idea that has been sitting on my note board since some time late last year. The quality is not the best, and I could probably write to a higher standard if I hadn't been playing Mass Effect 3 since ungodly hours in the morning, but if I left it, it would sit on my hard drive until an archaeological team uncovers it in centuries time, or a wastelander finds my corpse by my computer and decides to flich through before raiding my bottle cap collection.